On Sunday, Takafumi attended his undokai (athletic meeting) for the morning daycare he goes to twice a week. Recently he does not want to attend the daycare stating "Taka sick, Taka sleeping all day. Ringo no Ki no, Taka sleeping (snoring sounds included)." Nonetheless he went and participated in the Undokai.
So I would like to point out two cultural issues that I noticed. The first was something I really did not like because of my belief that children are creating their identities and should be allowed to express themselves as long as it does not hurt anyone else. All the children were sitting down on the benches watching while the father`s were participating in a game. One of the father`s did something that Takafumi thought was funny, so he laughed out loud. The teacher scolded him for laughing, and showed him how to clap instead. I understand that in Japan, you must be like everybody else in order to survive, and basically you have to throw away your own ability to think in order to survive here.....but one can not even laugh? I am sure the Japanese teachers would not agree with me, but I was proud when Takafumi again laughed outloud when he saw his own dad do something that Taka thought was funny. Go Taka! LoL!
Another culture issue to address about the Undokai. The daycare Taka attends is slightly religious based. Their our short prayers and some religious songs I believe. The main 2 owners have quite a bit of expeirence working at a Lutheran International School, and all the staff really have great talent. They are definately Japanese in their strict adherance to rules and 1 way to do things, but use many techniques/styles that resemble the Western way of educational thinking. The one point that amuses me most is their use of bribery. I think the only reason Taka was sitting still during all the waiting time at the undokai is because he was expecting to get candy. He always says "Taka eat the candy at Ringo no Ki." I too sometimes rarely use bribery, but try not to because I know it will bite me in the butt all too soon. (Taka already says "Let me see." if he asks for something and I say I do not have money. If I do not let him see, he goes into my purse to see for himself. He caught on to how money works really quickly.)
Speaking of bribery, let`s turn to the issue of potty training. I know several people who have done this and have seen this advice in books. What? You will get candy if you poop in the toilet. You will get a bike if you poop in the toilet. I do not think the Japanese use this technique. I think they just do it as a matter of fact. When you go poop in the toilet it feels better than the hoozy, squeezy, stinky poop in your diaper chafing your butt. I went with the matter of fact method in toilet training and it worked for us. I can only imagine how using bribery would have backfired for me in the toilet training process.
Now on to a new topic. This does not have as much to do with TAka`s bilingual/cultural upbringing as it has to do with my Japanese language and cultural learning/experiences. I do believe what happens to me/and my reactions greatly effects/affects Taka, so I will include some of my memoriable experiences. (First let me say, that I am greatly trying to become literate in Japanese not only for myself, but so that I never have to rely on Taka to translate/interpret for me. That is not his job. ) So on to the most recent JAPAN experience.
I took Taka to a Sports Center in order to go swimming. I forgot that we had to wear swimming caps and to take off my necklace. As we entered the pool, a lady staff came out to tell me of the rules. She gave a detailed explanation using normal Japanese all of which I understood, and started to turn to go buy the swimcaps. As I did that she throws in the cross the hands in the x (or no position) and says "no" (something you might do to a toddler or a person with a cognitive disability). So my question is...why did you bother to give the detailed explanation if you just assumed that I was not going to understand it and in order to help me you had to throw in the Insulting "no". Ugh! Spreading awareness of difference takes so much patience. I really wanted to throw a tantrum like a child since she felt she had to treat me like a child. Living in a foreign country makes you understand the plight of all foreigners living in a foreign country.
More adventures in Japan and raising a bilingual child (and self) next time....
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